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Wonda Starr

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Just another run-of-the-mill stunningly beautiful biological female woman. Check out the blogs for the facts this company will never tell you.

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Iceland in Celebration | Wanda Star is Leaving the Country

The time for me to leave Iceland is now. Charges have been dropped, restraining orders have expired, and vengeful relatives have moved out of town. I can finally return to the UK. Anyone who is familiar with my blogs knows that I have wholeheartedly embraced Iceland and its culture the entire time I’ve been here. The four years I’ve endured it, I have done so with very little complaint, and only ever then with serious forethought and consideration. See also: How Iceland Ruined History and 5 Reasons to Hate Icelandic Summer by Wanda Star However, changing circumstances at home means

The UGLY truth about Iceland

For any philistines who do not know, I am Wanda Star, Reykjavík’s premier local entertainer, and most beautiful woman. Having resided on this rock (I can’t stretch to calling it a country) for the past three years, I think it’s high time that someone dispelled many of the rumours about this god-awful place. As an insider of Iceland, I can confirm that there is an ongoing international propaganda campaign to convince foreigners that this barren island on the edge of the Arctic Circle is a lovely place to have a vacation. Like the existence of the Northern Lights, this is a myth. It is a trap

Here We Go Again... Iceland Prepares for World Cup Failure

Before beginning this article, I must apologise to my father. I know that it has been a long dream of yours for me to register some sort of interest in ‘foot-ball’, yet, as this piece will prove, I am continuing my lifelong tradition of constantly disappointing you.  Writing a blog about a sport I refuse to even pronounce correctly is not something I would normally do, but as someone solemnly sworn to tackle the Icelandic news of the day, it is impossible to avoid.  This month, ‘foot-ball’ is all anyone has been jabbering about. For those blessed with ignorance on this matter, Iceland has

Icelanders Who Deserve to be Deported Before Refugee Children

It is my absolute dream to be deported from Iceland. I have been stranded here ever since the government took my passport - they didn’t believe that the training course I did in Syria was on creative writing - and I am dying for an escape. In spite of this, there are families in Iceland who actually don’t want to be deported but are facing it anyway, who have invoked a feeling in me that I have never experienced before. I don’t know what the word for it is (perhaps there isn’t one), but it’s like when I feel sorry for myself, except this time it’s for other people. Is this feeling that Phi

Feminism in Iceland | The Poor, Poor Men

But should we? Iceland is the only country in the world that killed more men for witchcraft than it did women. Icelandic women are now the most enfranchised and powerful on earth. Coincidence? I think not. With a combination of sexuality, screaming and sorcery, Icelandic women have been fast gaining power, and now pose a legitimate threat to the time-honoured patriarchal system. In fact, multiple sources for years have cited Iceland as the world’s most gender-equal country, but with the rapid advancement of one side, the balance seems set to tip over. As someone who is extremely clearly a n

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The Revolting Cuisine of Iceland

There are many cultures that have cuisines so delicious, unique and fascinating, they draw visitors from around the world. In the city of Yulin, an annual festival involves the killing and roasting of up to 15,000 dogs, and I cannot recommend the lab-kebab enough. The Korowai People of Papua New Guinea are the world’s last remaining cannibal tribe, and their honey-roasted rib cage is to die for; it literally cannot be recreated. Even in the UK, we congeal the blood and fat of pigs and have the hardened result as part a hearty breakfast, just one part of our international reputation for á l

5 Reasons to Hate Summer in Iceland

June has come and gone, so Iceland is officially in what it’s idea of summer is. After a long and brutal winter, in which my Vitamin D reached the levels of what my doctor described as ‘like a very sickly child’, you think I’d be happy. Then again, you don’t know me. The only thing in the world worse than an Icelandic winter is an Icelandic summer. Yes, we can say goodbye to 20 hours of darkness a day, to the endless storms, and the general sense of all-pervading misery, but what are we exchanging them for? Is it even worth it? Read ahead to discover the five worst things about Iceland’s s

BE VERY AFRAID | Discussing Terrorists and the Armed Police in Iceland

Iceland is at the most critically dangerous time in its history. Following the attacks in London and Manchester, its terror alert has risen from a shade of off-white to a very pale beige.  By just slightly existing, the threat of terrorism is so frighteningly high that the Icelandic SWAT Team will join normal police forces to maintain order at public events, with their guns clearly visible. But will this help stave fears and suppress violence, or do the opposite? Read on to decide what should keep you awake for longer at night: an armed police force with no experience in dealing with extremi

Rising Rent in Reykjavik | The Most Boring Conversation in Iceland

I hate three things more than anything else in this world; I despise reading, I loathe listening to the problems of others, and I detest people who start a conversation with a series of complaints. Having a Facebook page in Iceland at the moment is thus a complete and utter misery. It seems like the entire nation is clogging up my newsfeed with the same problem, meaning I’m constantly getting distracted when re-watching videos of Harambe being shot. And it really is the most boring problem in the world: housing. Ever been to a great party where all anyone is talking about is rent hikes,

9 Reasons To Industrialise & Exploit Iceland's Nature

Iceland is a country full of potential. It has powerful glacial rivers and is seething with geothermal energy; it has vast expanses of land full of untouched nature; and it has a corrupt, money-hungry government desperate to make a quick buck. When you put all these facts together, you should come to one conclusion: Iceland is ripe for exploitation. And yet, in spite of all promise, Icelanders’ penchant for failure comes to the forefront once more. Iceland has barely invested in the heavy industry that could turn their country from an empty wasteland into an industrial wasteland, and it’s a

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